Hey, I just found this, not write it. Don't shoot the messenger.
From Shot by Both Sides.....
New Beatitudes for the Religious Right
Blessed are the poor in generosity: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they that judge: for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are the aggressive: for they shall acquire the earth.
Blessed are they which do lust in self-righteousness: for they shall be filled.
Blessed are the unmerciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the impure in heart: for they shall see God.
Blessed are the warmakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
Blessed are they which persecute for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven