From the brilliant Tom Burka at his tongue-in-cheek Opinions You Should Have.....
GOP To Make Law Giving Everyone's Money To The Rich- Bankruptcy Bill Ditched In Favor Of More "Direct" Legislation
The GOP leadership in Congress has decided to throw out the Bankruptcy Bill in favor of legislation that directly transfers all money from the poor and middle class to wealthy individuals and mammoth corporations.
"The bankruptcy bill -- which completely stopped this horrible practice of providing middle class and poor people a fresh start -- was a great idea" said Bill Frist. "But then we figured, why not just give those big corporations and CEO's the money directly?"
"We're tired of all these half-measures," agreed Sen. Mitch McConnell.
Republicans also expressed frustration at the length of time it was taking to dismantle social programs helping the poor and middle-class to live. "What is taking so freaking long already?" said John Sununu. "It's time for the downtrodden to start stumbling about on their own two gimpy legs, without the government getting involved and stirring up trouble."
Republicans were also concerned that government programs continued to regulate corporations for the good of the people. "These public policy initiatves are getting in the way of the ownership society," said Sen. Rick Santorum.
"Owning things is good," said Fred Dursley, President of Chase Manhattan Bank and a sponsor of the Bankruptcy Bill. "But sometimes owing things is better."
There are numerous steps when arranging a funeral service, whether it be preparation for burial or entombment. These include, but are not limited to:
Obtain a Burial Certificate - Law requires a burial permit to be procured by next of kin, typically via a licensed funeral director or through the local Vital Records or Birth and Death Registration office. Usually, a nominal fee is charged to acquire a burial permit.
Select a Burial Site - Oftentimes, the deceased will have either orally requested a burial site before death, or even have written such a request in a will.
Transport Deceased to Burial Site - This can be accomplished through a mortuary or special car service, typically in the form of the traditional hearse. However, many opt to customize this aspect of the funeral procession, in terms of the vehicle selected for transportation. There's usually an additional charge associated with transporting the deceased.
Opening and Closing of Gravesite - This must be arranged with the cemetery ahead of time, and there's typically a fee associated with both the opening and closing of the grave. Fees may vary depending on the day and times of service.
Purchasing a Burial Vault or Liner - Burial vaults, or liners, encapsulate the walls of a casket and prevent the surrounding earth from collapsing the casket over time. Typically, these aren't usually required by law, but often mandatory at most cemeteries, as it helps with site maintenance.
Select a Monument or Grave Marker - It is customary, and sometimes required by cemeteries, to purchase and place a headstone, tombstone or memorial marker at the gravesite for identification and also ritualistic traditions.
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